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TWO EASY STEPS TO GETTING A CLERKSHIP

“People will tell you that you need to prepare answers to a wide-range of questions...

These people are wrong.”


PERCIVAL MONTGOMERY III outlines the two steps required for a clerkship.



STEP 1

People will tell you that you need to prepare answers to a wide-range of questions demonstrating work experience, extracurricular activities, and a genuine interest in the law.


These people are wrong.


Only one question is actually important: “So how’s your dad?”


You’ll want to hit on a couple of important points here. Firstly, make sure to mention he’s doing well. Try to mention something fun he’s done lately, like sailing around the Mediterranean or skiing in Aspen.


This should provide an easy segue to the second step, mentioning a big project he’s just finished up. It should be something like defending a multinational pharmaceutical company from a pesky class action or working on the merger between two multinational pharmaceutical companies. This signals that he’s a big player who deserves the interviewer’s respect. Bonus points if the project involves a client the firm is interested in.


Thirdly, make a vague comment about his possible future plans. Recent grad hires have reported success mentioning a move to investment banking or seeking Liberal preselection in the seat of Vaucluse. Either way the firm will understand your Dad will continue to wield influence for some time and it might be worth keeping his useless douchebag of a son on the payroll as a favour.


STEP 2

Make sure to check which GPS school the partner interviewing you went to beforehand. Hopefully they went to the same one and you’ll be home and hosed. Alternatively, having lived at the same College is a good bet. If they went to the ANU there’s no need to check (they went to Burgmann too).


Importantly, you’ll want to be prepared to discuss how the 1st XV has been going this season. Have two or three picks for who you think has a good chance of breaking into the Wallabies in six years or so. Finally, if your school’s big grudge match is scheduled before when you’ll receive your offer think about attending for some post-interview networking.


Best of luck with the clerkship process. Remember, you were born for this.

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